Happy Birthday Murdoch!

Okay so this is a day late because going over the whole birthing saga - you will just have to humor me. So it is one year and one day! And I can't believe how much you have grown, changed, and how much you have changed and added to our lives! We got a great video of you yesterday AM - I love how happy you are when you wake up. I love walking into your room with you standing in your crib with the biggest smile so happy to see me - I just know it is going to kill me that as you get older I won't get that huge smile in the mornings. I love the fact that right now we are your whole world - or at least most of it. It is so easy right now - in general we control everything but it is going to get so much harder as you get older when you have all of the outside influences that mold and shape you into the person that you will eventually be. It is hard for me to even think about that piece of your life and it actually makes me sad because my baby will no longer be my baby. One of our major goals for you is to raise you to be an independent person but that is also one of the most painful things that will happen because I know I will want to take care of you and shelter you from things forever when I know I can't. It is going to be a very big struggle between my heart and my head.

I can go on forever like this so I will end it now. I just want to let you know that I love you to the point that I want to squeeze you so hard it would kill you. I will always love you no matter what.

Here is a little message from your grandmother in STL:

Dear Murdoch, Just think, one year ago we all received the most precious gift which was you! To quote Fred Rogers - You don't ever have to do anything sensational to love or be loved. You can never imagine how many people already love you, including me. Happy First Birthday, I am with you in thought. Love - Gram Parsons

All of my love!